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6 Takeaways From The Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion, Part 1

Jennifer's determined to lock down the villain role.
  • Margaret Josephs, Melissa Gorga in RHONJ. (Bravo)
    Margaret Josephs, Melissa Gorga in RHONJ. (Bravo)

    The Real Housewives of New Jersey have reached the pinnacle of their tenth season: the reunion. RHONJ seasons often seem purposefully constructed so that all the season's storylines can and will converge in the final episodes, setting off the loudest fireworks yet (and inviting viewers who didn't watch every week to tag back in for the "real" show). The tenth season was no different in that regard, and the first segment of this year's three-parter wasted no time lighting up the sky. (Or maybe that was just Jackie's extremely assertive body glitter.)

    Danielle isn't onstage yet in the first part, so the cringiest drama is yet to come. And given how heavily invested the show clearly is in Teresa as its lead and center, and how determined both the show and Tre have been to maximize Juicy Joe's legal/immigration issues (fully half the finale was spent on their emotional and awkward reunion in Italy), it's interesting how little we hear about that relationship in the first hour.

    But plenty of intra-Housewife relationships have their turn in the spotlight, and one 'wife in particular has concluded that negative attention is better than no attention at all. If you forgot to set the DVR for Part 1, here's your cheat sheet…

    Jennifer has apparently concluded that the most reliable route to screentime is to interrupt the others constantly with rude commentary. And...you know, she's not wrong. Stricken reaction shots won't cut it on RHONJ; just ask the Wakiles (if you can find them). As with much of Jen's outré behavior in Season 10, it's very obvious what the intent is, and very clumsily executed -- like mocking Melissa for having a Melissa-themed birthday party; it's...her birthday, what else would she theme it? In fact, her spirited harping on Melissa, from Melissa's "fake-ass storyline" about wanting another child to Melissa's alleged self-affirmations while scrolling through her own Instagram, read to me like a producer's attempt to cause trouble between Melissa and Teresa when Teresa's defense of Melissa is half-hearted at best. But while it's perhaps not genuine, it's definitely effective, as the Margaret-Melissa-Jackie couch can't stop rolling their eyes at her.

    Producers could well be setting up Season 11 as another round of sister-in-law drama. When Jennifer accuses Melissa of complimenting her own social-media photos, out loud, to herself, Melissa denies it and demands to know who told Jennifer she does that. The camera immediately cuts to Teresa rearranging a strand of her weave and making her patented thinky-lying face. She's not called on it, yet, but when Andy Cohen asks Teresa if she agrees with Jennifer that Melissa is too self-centered to have another kid, Ambassador Einstein mealy-mouths something about Melissa not staying home with a baby this time around. It's the kind of non-answer guaranteed to fester in the family...in response to the kind of question guaranteed to get that telegenic result.

    David's house is done, and Dolores might be done too. Dolo begins the segment unflappably, announcing that David's house is completed, but she is not living there and does not plan to. She's also coolly gracious about viewers wanting her and Frank Sr. back together. But as the questions continue and Andy keeps pushing the other 'wives to weigh in on whether Dolores should do better, Dolores can't maintain the facade; her frustration at David bailing on Melissa's party -- in Episode 3, let's remember! -- is probably the tip of an iceberg of resentment. Jen could have put it better (someone should stitch that on a pillow...a really expensive one) but she's right: Dolores is settling.

    Jackie and Dolores do have a friendship now. But it took work on both sides, Jackie says. It's funny; the way they talk about building their relationship definitely smacks of, like, colleagues who had to room together on a work retreat and found a grudging common ground? But that's...what they are, so good for them.

    The Frank Jr./Gia 'ship is not on. First of all, what would we call that -- "Fria"? Second of all, was the stated reason -- Little Frankie is interviewing for investment-banking jobs, and wouldn't have time for a relationship -- hilariously weird to anyone else? Y'all know the markets close at like 4 PM, right? Just say the truth, that Gia's a little too young for him, and/or they basically grew up together and it's like dating a sibling.

    Jackie was not exaggerating the seriousness of her eating disorder. Not that I thought she was, but I hadn't seen the wedding photos before, and Margaret's right: Jackie is emaciated in those pictures. Jackie looks lovely now, and it sounds like people have responded to that storyline in a positive way and look to her as an example, so while I still don't entirely trust RHONJ to foreground capital-I issues, good for Jackie for taking it on.

    People are talking about this week's episode in our forums. Join the conversation.

    Sarah D. Bunting co-founded Television Without Pity, and her work has appeared in Glamour and New York, and on MSNBC, NPR's Monkey See blog, MLB.com, and Yahoo!. Find her at her true-crime newsletter, Best Evidence, and on TV podcasts Extra Hot Great and Again With This.

    TOPICS: The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Bravo, Melissa Gorga, Teresa Giudice, Reality TV